Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Additional Scoops of Idiocy

Kellogg's ran an ad for Raisin Bran Crunch not too long ago that we here at Ad Wizards thought was an asinine, tortured, 30-second turd fest. Well, good news for turd fest aficionados: Kellogg's has apparently deemed that ad worthy of turning into a campaign:



In the spirit of cooperation, I'll assume this commercial is intended to be tongue-in-cheek, and I won't go into it line-by-line. But I would like to ask a few general questions:

1. Does something as vanilla as a bran cereal with dried fruit really attract "superfans"?
2. Is the idea of a bran cereal "superfan" supposed to be the basis for the "humorous" absurdity in these ads?
3. Does absurdity sell a lot of boxes of cereal?

Maybe Kellogg's knows the answers to those questions. Or maybe they have no idea, and they're just throwing shit against a wall and seeing what sticks. Either way, I guess they have a concept for an ad here. However, the "punchline" of the ad doesn't work. You have three Raisin Bran Crunch fans on a pilgrimage to the Raisin Bran Crunch plant. They are each eating cereal while driving in a vehicle emblazoned with the Raisin Bran Crunch logo and sporting a Sun mascot mirror dangler. All the while they're talking exclusively about Raisin Bran Crunch. Then, we have this:

Backseat Guy: You know what will really get us in the spirit? (singing) 99 boxes of Raisin Bran Crunch, if you're nice to me, I'll share some with you...

Passenger Seat Guy: ... (silence, turns head slowly, shocked expression)

Okay, no, dude. You are eating a bowl of Raisin Bran Crunch in a car with 2 other people doing the same while traveling to see where Raisin Bran Crunch is made. You are certified, batshit insane. You cannot believably express surprise at anyone else's actions. You cannot believably act shocked at anything!

I have an idea for the next installment of this campaign: our colorful trio of RBC boosters decide they want to meet their mascot-hero face-to-face. So they volunteer to pilot NASA's first, and only, manned mission to the Sun. As they near the center of our solar system, the cheerful chords of "99 Boxes of Raisin Bran Crunch" fade away softly as their space shuttle, decorated with bright red Kellogg's logos, is incinerated at 5,778 degrees Kelvin. Tagline: Kellogg's Raisin Bran Crunch: Remember, it's bran and dead grapes. Don't overdo it.

6 comments:

Andrew N.P. said...

Okay, I get that Raisin Bran Crunch is like crack cocaine to these guys, but do they really need to show Driver Guy grabbing handfuls of the stuff while the car is in motion? That's just irresponsible. (Not that it would be any great loss if the Sunny-mobile were to crash and kill these nuts, but still.)

Quivering P. Landmass said...

That would be another great installment of the campaign. Then maybe the hospital they ended up at after the crash would be all out of Raisin Bran Crunch, and they could do a "Whopper Freakout"-style ad for RBC. Oh, the possibilities!

Anonymous said...

Can someone tell me why the ad geniuses believe that having people talking through crunchy mouthfuls of food is somehow appealing or will inspire others to think this food is SO irresistible that one can't take time to swallow? I hit the mute button at the first slurp. And I will NEVER buy this stuff.

Anonymous said...

There must be legions of people that find this annoying, brain-dead series of commercials an insult to anyone's intelligence. Since these three morons appear to have an obsession with this stuff, I'd like to see this series of commercials end where our three mental midgets are eating bowls of cereal in a vineyard. A pack of escaped convicts from a hospital for the criminally insane happen upon them. After observing the mindless banter of the three stooges, even the less-than-senseless inmates have their intelligence insulted and act on their primal urges, whereupon they kill and eat the subjects of our misery as the Kellogg's sun sets...

Teresa said...

Okay, does ANYBODY know the name of the tune at the end of this commercial?? It's just a few notes of a clarinet, and kind of reminds me of the Odd Couple theme. Yet I am hearing this darn song all over the place now and I can't figure out what it is!! It was also in a McGruff the Crime Dog commercial, a Subway sandwiches commercial last Christmas, and on an episode of The Hills last season. This is driving me nuts! Any help would be much appreciated!!

Quivering P. Landmass said...

@teresa:
I'm sure it's just stock, pindrop music that's used in all sorts of ads and cartoons and such. So yeah, I don't know. And it could very well not even be an actual song.