Friday, May 16, 2008

Under no circumstances should you even think about "doing one"

I'm glad that Dairy Queen didn't use their "Do one" tagline for this ad. I can't say that makes it much less horrible, though.

Okay, seriously. How old are those kids - eight? This is appalling. "Don't worry about getting two sundaes, Mom. I'm just going to flirt with that boy over there. Tee hee!" This isn't a damn singles bar. And why is the mom's response just a look that verges problematically between astonishment and being impressed, rather than dragging her daughter out of the place by the ear, which is what should be happening?

Where did that sundae come from, anyway? It shows up in like five seconds! I'm supposed to believe that kid paid for that thing, even though he doesn't seem to ever get up? Does he have a tab? Is he like that skeevy drunk who sits at the end of the bar and sends a cosmopolitan to any halfway attractive girl who glances in his direction? God. The only way this could be worse would be if he sent her a banana split and they showed her eating the banana. "Jeez, Mom, I'm almost nine. I know how to eat a banana."

Now I kind of feel like I'm going to go into a Dairy Queen and Chris Hansen is going to be behind the counter to ask me what I'm doing there. But aside from that awful creepiness, A+, Dairy Queen.


Quivering P. Landmass said...

That is... unnerving. That just does not make it look fun to eat ice cream. Yet another place I'll have to avoid because their advertising sucks so bad.

Why is the kid wearing a "donkey" shirt? Pathetic attempt at humor? Or veiled political reference?

Tyler said...

I just spent the last minute trying to see if there is, in fact, a donkey on his shirt. I will never get this minute back.

In addition: I'm going to hope that you never have to use the "to catch a sundae" label ever again.

Quivering P. Landmass said...

I also lost a minute of my time! There's definitely something with long, pointy ears on his shirt, but it looks more like Bugs Bunny than a donkey.

Windier E. Megatons said...

I think it's a donkey - you can see that stereotypical tuft of hair between the ears, and the snout (barely visible above the table line) looks like a donkey's, at least as opposed to anything like Bugs Bunny.

Aaaaand there goes a minute of my time. My only remaining question is, did the kid just show up wearing that shirt and they built the waiter's line around it, or did they actually have wardrobe put him in a donkey shirt? Because if there's any kind of play on words with "ass" going on here, I am going to take a flamethrower to DQ corporate headquarters.

Tyler said...

When you see it on television, you can see a little better that it is a donkey...or the Quik Bunny.