Monday, February 9, 2009

Mistress Joyce's Ford Dealership

We try to stay away from local ads on this site, mostly because it's just not fair to pick on the little guys when there's so much bad advertising being created by Fortune 500 companies. But sometimes a commercial comes along that's so laughably stupid that we just can't stay away. Check out the link below (and you can probably guess which local market this is for based on the accent alone):

Click here for video (embedding disabled)

Maureen Joyce: At Joyce Ford, accessories come free of charge.

Note: In the following commercial, "accessories" apparently means grown men.

Hey ladies, how's this for an incentive. If you're looking for something sporty, how 'bout takin' Johnny
(shows cheesy white guy in a Mustang) for a ride?

So a car dealership is forced to do double duty by selling both cars and male prostitutes. Damn this recession! And it's a sad day indeed when a gigolo airlifted out of a John Hughes movie can't even afford a shirt to match his stylin' grey/black tracksuit.

Maureen Joyce: Want something big and tough? Then you want Bruce (shows bearded white guy in an Explorer SUV).

When I think "big and tough," I think of a man with the name of "Bruce." Does Maureen Joyce realize that she's referring to her cars by the made-up names of average looking male actors? This seems like a curious approach in the worst car sales environment in decades.

Maureen Joyce: How about something environmentally friendly? How 'bout Mario (shows skinny black guy in a hybrid)?

If a blind person were listening to this ad, he would be really confused right about now. I fail to see what's environmentally friendly about Mario. Because he has glasses? Because he looks generally put-together? Because he gives us an awkward thumbs-up? Why pick the one non-white actor in your commercial to play the environmentally friendly guy?

Maureen Joyce: My type is practical and reliable, so I prefer James (shows douchey college guy in a Fusion).

First of all, Mario looks way more like the embodiment of practicality and reliability. Secondly, James is a little young for you, Mrs. Joyce.

Maureen Joyce: No matter what your style, Joyce Ford has something for you.

"Unless your style is women. We don't carry that. You'll have to go across the street to the Toyota dealership -- they sell cars to straight men and lesbians."

Joyce Ford - The Better Half of Car Buying

Is there a sentence in the English language that better demonstrates the stereotypical Chicago accent than this slogan?

Maureen Joyce really wants an all-female clientele, seems like. I understand having the angle of "buy from me because I know how women want to buy cars," but to have a commercial like this that just makes men want to throw up? Maybe not the best approach, especially in this economy.


Windier E. Megatons said...

"Do you come with the car?"

"Oh, you. [giggles]"

Adam said...

I do not believe that those shifty looking fellows would even attract female customers.

Well, perhaps if the female customers they are trying to attract have low standards or are blind (blind people usually don't purchase cars though), then maybe they would stand a chance at having people see that and then decide to go in and consider purchasing a vehicle.

However, considering this is a local commercial, it may be the case that all people from Chicago are hideous creatures who prefer not to be seen during the day and these below average male actors are quite attractive to them. Although this scenario is as unlikely as people wanting to go to that dealership after viewing that monstrosity.

Adam said...

Next time I need to buy a Ford while in the Chicago area, I think I'll be heading over to Joe's Ford and Stripper Emporium.

Ol' Joe always says: "If you like Fords and Strippers, this is the place for you!"

Joe said...

What a strange commercial. I can't decide if the "accessories" are actors or employees. Is Bruce really supposed to entice someone to buy a car? I'd pass!

The problem with local dealerships is that they want the world with their ads, but don't have the budgets to do anything right. They often go for humor, but the owners/GMs are so full of themselves that they can't admit that they're NOT FUNNY, and they'll usually insist on being a part of it, mostly because they like seeing themselves on TV.

Joe said...

Let's see:

-she loves boring cars
-she seeks female bonding through collective male bashing
-she over-promotes her heterosexual preference
-she has a clear disdain for current fashion and beauty products

Uh, Maureen, do we need to stage an intervention to out you?

Auto Advertising said...

I agree that a lot of car marketing has been too sexist for too long. Taking it too far the other way doesn't really fix the problem.

Interesting, too that we didn't really get to see the cars. Infiniti learned that one the hard way in Australia - their launch ads showed a whole bunch of nature shots but no car. Infiniti never made an impact in our market and packed up and went home after a couple of dismal years.

Automotive Recruitment said...

Wow! That is a seriously bad ad. It breaks not only rules of advertising, but lacks common sense. Perhaps they were simply going for the 'there's no such thing as bad publicity' angle.